Let's pick these over. First, you notice I didn't list "fear of private health care." If Martin were against private health care, he'd designate Jean Charest as Public Health Care Enemy No. 1. Only last week, the Quebec government announced plans to let people buy private insurance for services covered under the public health care plan. But picking a fight with Charest would vaguely undermine the Grits' vague Quebec credentials. As long as there's still a chance of keeping Jean Lapierre's seat in Outremont, Martin won't do that. Fortunately, Ralph Klein's still around to play punching bag.

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Many Canadians plainly find the Conservative leader terrifying. Yet, in most cases, his only crime is to believe today what Paul Martin believed in 2002: that the Kyoto accord won't work, that missile defence is swell, that gay marriage is icky, and that staying out of the Iraq war might be bad politics. In fact, if you push him on most of that, Harper will step back, which makes him more or less interchangeable with Martin.

Yet Harper remains an easy guy to demonize. Probably he can't do anything about the voters who've decided he's scary. His challenge in this election will be to hang onto voters who don't think he's scary -- but do wonder (a) what he'd actually do as prime minister; and (b) why he's always so cranky.

I'm told the Conservatives have produced a much more elaborate campaign platform than anything we've seen yet. They've been afraid to show it to you because they're sure the Liberals will steal it. My hunch, based on not very much, is that it's actually a good platform. My other hunch is that the Tories will complain, the day after voting day, that the Canadian public didn't have enough time to get to know it.

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Last week, Layton broke a six-month parliamentary deadlock by agreeing with Harper that this government is no longer worth supporting. Harper looked as if someone had shot his dog. It would be really swell if he could greet good news as good news, just once, before we decide whether or not to let him run the country.

One last thing. The fourth Liberal theme I identify above -- the gullibility of New Democrat voters -- has bugged me for a long time. I don't write much about it lately because (full disclosure) my girlfriend now works for the NDP. But what the heck: if you like the New Democrats but you vote for the Liberals to stop Harper, you profoundly deserve to wind up with a Conservative MP. You're just as likely to wind up with a Liberal who won't do a thing about your issues until he suckers you in the next election. One question we're about to answer is whether the opportunists are the only people in this country with the courage of their convictions.